bones.

haven't been posting anything lately cause i was getting too self conscious about what i'm about to write and ended up not writing anything at all. there, i've said it. this time i'm not even gonna use the oh, hey i'm a medical student and thus i won't have time to entertain this pathetic blog of mine card. cause i'm pretty sure nobody'll be reading this anymore other than the ridiculous spammer (if that is even human!!) on my shoutbox HA-HA.

but i'm not apologizing. yes, i'm not.

cause sometimes being an over-analytical, obsessing bitch that actually stop for alongfuckingwhile before i decided to speak out will ensure that i'll wont get into any trouble or attracts any unnecessary drama. i have enough drama from back home, the house and school. so much so i was getting pretty sick of all of it :(

and i thought keeping distance is enough. le sigh. i gotta find a better defense mechanism than walking away ain't i? like, stop whining like a bitch, bite my tongue and get on with dear life.

sooooo, i've numbed out is that a bad thing?

***

what am i doing? : orthopaedic 101. day 1 and i'm in the ot for major surgery. it was brutal. the sight of bone being saw, drill, hammered, nuts & bolts, wires, and leg bended on the most unnatural position traumatized me. but i was equally amused though. fine, actually i'm not quite sure on what to feel still. there's still 8weeks to go, this feeling might change.

time to go off, day 2 till uhm everyday of the posting is morning rounds. taa!


***


raping the replay button: pumped out kicks - foster the people. 

it's like ohemgee

i don't think i'll ever get used to when the most random people come up to me and say 'oh hey, btw i read you're blog' cause you know it's a rare, no seriously rrrrrrrraaarrrrreeeeeeee like if i'm an animal, i'll be like the one on the verge of extinction #win.

but dear people-that-i-know-you-but-i-didn't-know-you're-reading-my-blog-people or you, uhm thank you for reading my crappy blog *insert cute face here* haha.

i swear i'll try to tune down the emo-nest. oh well, i guess now i need more brain fart post then. 

on the other hand, i'm so glad that i'm never too specific when i'm mentioning somebody especially when i'm being bitchy. you'll never know how somebody would use your words against you.


************

i'm tired, my back hurt, i'm sleepy, i have reading to catch up to, i need to churn out a presentation for my cwu, i have ssm to worry about, i have short case to be nervous about, i need multiple droids of myself to go about and do all these. i need a break, i need a freaking life.

i'm being cranky, i just need a nap.

*abrupt end, bye*

Lesson #1

so i heard rumour from the grapevine that apparently being a wonderwomen is not enough. people are expecting you to be more than that. being a bystander is frowned upon and growing an extra appendage is a necessity.

well some people are born to be a leader, but some just want to survive juggling 423198935589 stuff on their two hands.

for now i'm just getting the hang of not to slip up and step onto anybody's toes.

there's nothing wrong with that.

pout baby, pout.

i do believe the reason people got misled into thinking i'm getting skinnier by the day as oppose of the unfortunate ugly truth is because of, for no reason my lips are getting how should i say this, getting poutier (pouty-er? does such word even exist? anyway, you catch my drift) by the day and ended up distorting the face : lip ratio hence lead to the aforementioned deceit.

but of course me being a girl would of course never pass up on such a rare complement XD and i guess the current trends of donning 2 size bigger than your actual clothing size a la the Olsen twin  is helpful in maintaining that deceit and of course concealing everybody's worst enemy = the love handle.

le sigh.

but baby seriously in such state of nothing-to-be-happy-about study week, it's good to know being a pouty sourpuss is not all that bad.

my, my i do tend to ramble nonsense when i'm not suppose to.

right,study week! le sigh.

time to take a nosedive into the my sea of notes.

toodles.

juggling matter

"...take these broken wings and learn to fly

you were only waiting for this moment to arise

take this sunken eyes and learn to see

Blackbird fly..."

bits and pieces of the lyric from The Beatles, Blackbird Fly.
not the most motivational quotes out there but it works for me.

okay time to go back juggling 32981407591658916017 stuffs i have on my hands and try hard not to drop dead trying.

toodles.

Selfmade Hero.

NowPlaying.

i think i have a penchant for these kind of songs.

easy breezy.

Little Bit - Lykke Li

Hands down
I'm too proud, for love
But with eyes shut
It's you I'm thinking of

I'm Good, I'm Gone - Lykke Li

I'm working a sweat, but it's all good 
I'm breaking my back but it's all good

puffy eyes

there is a reason why i should not watch any dog related movie. it's my soft spot.

watch Hachiko and halfway through it i was like T_________T nonstop and..... (i don't know if you know the story already but imma do this anyway just to be safe)


*****SPOILER ALERT******







Richard Gere haven't died yet.








*****SPOILER END*****

and at the beginning i was like so sure that i wouldn't cry but then Hachiko was so loyal and so cute and, and, and i suddenly miss my dogs at home too and cried wtf. MAJOR FAIL.

and now my eyes looks like buns O.O

funky story.

curious how the human mind works. you do so many things in a day and by the end of the day you just remember one thing vividly. One.

armpit.

yes, armpit. well armpit smells actually. does anyone notice how the tutorial room smells bit funky lately? i think i commented about the room newly acquired musky smell a bit too loudly today when everyone in the room give me their most convincing T_____________T face before bursting into laughter.

seriously, nobody notice?

damn it. i think i'm losing my mind.

le sigh.

commercial break

and go catch a laptop with your ass cheeks. wtf. Butt but seriously people talk about challenging your body.



Bet he walks funny for few days after pulling this stunts. LMAO.

my 24hours

you it when medical school took over your life when 22hours of your day spent either, at the ward, OT, class, teachings, studying or dreaming about studying. 1hour fulfilling normal human physiological needs and the other hour being to tired to function.

i'm typing out this post cause i am contemplating whether i should continue my reading or just screw it and go to sleep.

don't think i can't feel your T_______T face right about now.

one should never felt guilty when they choose sleeping over studying. that is just wrong.

SCREW THIS I"M GOING TO BED.
.
.
.
.
.
RIGHT AFTER I FINISH THIS CHAPTER.

T____________________________________________T

blast from the past

no matter how perfect or imperfect your childhood are it is all pure tears, sweat, and blood that really brought you where you are now. Okay, maybe a little sprinkle of luck too.

mimosa

So, i finally grew a pair and cut me a bang up blunt bangs and dyed my hair back to black. no picture yet though but here is a random picture taken from my mother's garden.

oh, i just love holiday!

the hair issue

i suddenly have this sudden urge to have bangs. oh god if i really do cut it and it looks bad on me i am so eff up but then again points for having the balls and stupidity. 

and why do everybody must goes against it again? they made it even more tempting hurm. and what if it looks bad on me? i still can pin 'em up right? right. yes, i am as stubborn as a donkey.

now, lets just hope on that split second i grow a pair and just go for it. 

i've created a massive hoo-ha on my brain to cut hair that would grow back in few months. can i hear VAIN?

stagnant

These blog has been left  stagnant way too long and i am so sorry for that. by now of course i figure that you guys had stop coming to my blog and miraculously hope (or not!ha) for an update which i couldn't really do due to the lack of wireless internet connection on the place that i was posted to. i feel that it is not convenient to bring my laptop all the way to the computer room and blog my heart out. but then again i have my blackberry on me so all the above is just a goddamn long excuse to sugarcoat the fact that i am just plain lazy to blog. so there you go folks.


so many things going on so fast i can't even think straight. blogging sadly had fallen way, way bottom on my things to do list :(


i still do went around and read all the other blogs that i've followed but i just really can't think of anything to blog about anymore. boo.


maybe i should try blog like a tidbit of what's happening around me to re-re-re-jump start (coz god knows how many times have i've felt like quitting) my passion for blogging.

Cooper's update.

Remember my little cub-like pup?

He. Is. So. FURRRYYY. Now!!
and apparently have a severe case of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). 
I cant get enough of him. 
Luckily for me, I will be home (again!) for Eid Ul Adha.
So Yay!

*****

Gonna be away for Community Health posting this Wednesday for two months. Heard it'll be lots of fun.
But we'll see.
Now we pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pack!!

Hot Like Fire.

The XX-Hot Like Fire (Aaliyah Cover)

Feast for the ears. The XX. LOVE!

the sniffle

Just got back from the compulsory motivational/initiation camp from Negeri Sembilan and somehow manage to catch the cold fml. I am suppose to be very tired but then again after 4 days of internet detox, the only thing that I could have think of is going online despite the fact that my broadband connection at this part of KL is as fast a snail finishing off a 42km marathon wtf.


Anyway, my first posting will be Internal medicine. Time for some heavy reading.






p/s: LOL just notice that the picture posted are totally irrelevant to this post. *sniffle, sniffle*

90s baby.

I was killing time watching funny videos on Youtube and suddenly stumbled upon The Powerpuff Girls video.

"sugar, spice, and everything nice..."

Gosh, how I absolutely love these bug-eyed girls *tears*.

I guess growing up in the 90's the most memorable things to me is probably the cartoons. Back in the days you probably need a crowbar to pry me away from the tv  T_______T. err.. and I probably haven't change much now too *shame*

chapped lips

I'm the type of girl who 'eat' anything that is applied on my lips. 
Reapplying or not my lips still prone to chap. 
I've used tons of lip-gloss, lip-balm, lipstick, lip-whatever, 
but nothing work.
I believe it's one of my lifelong mission to find something that could last forever on my lips. 
And does not taste/smell like cancer causing chemical toxic. 
wtf.


 Anyway, picture is from the old(?) days where I still have my curly long hair. 

I think I'm beginning to miss my long hair. 

NAH!