what i should be doing

i am suppose to be freaking out by now knowing that tomorrow i'll be having my short case exam where i'll be in a nerve wrecking, cold-sweat-inducing, heart-popping situation when pound by tons of questions that i-can-only-hope-i-could-answer-questions by the lecturer instead here i am sitting here in front of my laptop with books on my lap typing this post and trying hard to scoop out the perfect kiwi balls.

T__________________________________________T

oh lady luck do be by my side tomorrow, pretty please?

final 3 weeks for O&G.

Gonna be busy, busy, busy.

but YAY!

wait maybe i should postpone the celebration AFTER the short case exam.

exam. UGH!

puffy eyes

there is a reason why i should not watch any dog related movie. it's my soft spot.

watch Hachiko and halfway through it i was like T_________T nonstop and..... (i don't know if you know the story already but imma do this anyway just to be safe)


*****SPOILER ALERT******







Richard Gere haven't died yet.








*****SPOILER END*****

and at the beginning i was like so sure that i wouldn't cry but then Hachiko was so loyal and so cute and, and, and i suddenly miss my dogs at home too and cried wtf. MAJOR FAIL.

and now my eyes looks like buns O.O

funky story.

curious how the human mind works. you do so many things in a day and by the end of the day you just remember one thing vividly. One.

armpit.

yes, armpit. well armpit smells actually. does anyone notice how the tutorial room smells bit funky lately? i think i commented about the room newly acquired musky smell a bit too loudly today when everyone in the room give me their most convincing T_____________T face before bursting into laughter.

seriously, nobody notice?

damn it. i think i'm losing my mind.

le sigh.

commercial break

and go catch a laptop with your ass cheeks. wtf. Butt but seriously people talk about challenging your body.



Bet he walks funny for few days after pulling this stunts. LMAO.

my 24hours

you it when medical school took over your life when 22hours of your day spent either, at the ward, OT, class, teachings, studying or dreaming about studying. 1hour fulfilling normal human physiological needs and the other hour being to tired to function.

i'm typing out this post cause i am contemplating whether i should continue my reading or just screw it and go to sleep.

don't think i can't feel your T_______T face right about now.

one should never felt guilty when they choose sleeping over studying. that is just wrong.

SCREW THIS I"M GOING TO BED.
.
.
.
.
.
RIGHT AFTER I FINISH THIS CHAPTER.

T____________________________________________T

my rock.

i always love to go shopping during the festive season the mall decoration is always so amazing especially during christmas. went out planning to watch narnia today but damn ticket sold out like hot cakes so ended up shopping   (again, sigh i know T___T) instead.

the mall is covered with huge teddies and other doll thingy!!! 

spot the door.

i say take my picture this way, this way *snap* 

communication fail. 

seriously, whoever did the mall deco at midvalley did a splendid job the deco is so CUTE!! there's 6-7 foot teddy everywhere and they were soft, squishy and oh so huggable. everytime i saw one i just had to resist the urge to run towards it and just hug it. seriously. but i didn't coz i'm a freaking 20 something T_____T.

eh, but wait. what i'm-a-20-something-so-i-don't-go-and-run-towards-the-cute-huggable-teddy?

teddy why so high up?

******
look what the bf gave me.

COMFORT FOOD! 

and lots of 'em too. this is one of the many reason why i love u. less than 3 my man less than 3.

<3.

suffice to say i am a happy not so little girl :)

mentally unstable

do you ever had that moment in life that you just don't feel like talking. nothing at all? random innocent people who didn't sense your sudden mood swing did the most slightest things that happen to irritates you and like a balloon you blew up on them.

poor thing don't even know what's going on.

this is just a bad bad week i guess. probably the stress is just too overwhelming or maybe i'm just pms-ing. at this point i just can't differentiate them anymore as i am way pass my mental capability to think straight.

i'm just glad that it is finally weekend.

surviving on call

with the midwifes specifically.

Step 1:

read ahead and know your stuff prior assisting in the labour room. if you are thaaaatt stupid (quoting one of the midwife here) observed buttload of labour until you grow an extra set of vagina.

Step 2:

as if growing an extra set of genital is enough, you need to develop thick skin as well. being scolded, tease and humiliated in front of your fellow friends, housemans, registrars, patients and their kins by the midwifes should be like a second nature to you. midwifes yap, filter out the important points mute out the unnecessary details, look indifferent, occasionally nod and leave.

Step 3:

show no emotion *refer to step 2*. breaking down is a waste of energy. being on call is not just the matter of surviving the 12hours but also surviving the consecutive 8-5 the next day. besides, tears are like midwifes magnet. it increases the midwifes affinity towards you. translation=BAD. however if crying is inevitable, do it privately. 

Step 4:

learn to accept your mistake and the midwifes' mistake as yours as well. cause in their mind you're always wrong. being indifferent is the key here. besides, patient's safety is still the priority. Hence, pointing out the midwifes obvious mistake is necessary despite the risk of getting scolded. so, INDIFFERENT. 

I might have gone loopy from all the mental tortures and the physical exhaustion from this posting but call me crazy or a masochist to be exact, those *bleeping* midwifes is the ones that got me thinking if this is the profession that I wanted to do for the rest of my life and I never felt so sure of myself until last night.

But I probably wont pursue Obs n Gyn as my field though. Cause hey I might be a masochist but I'm not thaaaaattt stupid.