Of Flower and Kisses

Well more like tuna, egg and bread now. Ugh. I had a thing with tuna now its like a craving I cant not fulfill it and it making me talk gibberish. You can stop cringing your face now it'll cause u wrinkle.

*note: u can skip reading the next paragraph its all tuna talking*

I hope life could have been more interesting than what I'm leading now. Routine was driving me mad. I couldn't live with one it make me feel so rigid and lifeless. I woke up almost the same time everyday (read:late) , contemplating with oneself whether I should attend the oh so boring lecture and continue my sleep there or just sleep back here and just attend the lecture after that *thinking with eyes closed hoping that i'll dream of an answer*, decide to woke up anyway cause I am such a wimp to skip an important lecture and go get dress up lazily. Haiz, I swear if mum would see me like that she would probably be so irritated and i'll ended up like George Bush but the only different is I'll be half awake to dodge the shoe.

If you still don't get the tittle nevermind it doesn't mean anything anyway. Ok maybe it is partly due to the fact that Mr. Boyfriend is now officially 1 and a half hour flight away from me and things would remain as such for nearly one month period! My my I feel like single again *background song: It raining men* ok I'm kiding *change to sombre funeral music* there happy?! nggrr..

Question. Had you ever fought so hard for one thing and then when you get the thing that u want exactly as u wanted it to be like what u wanted you are not as excited as you thought you would be even though you've tried so hard to find the smallest amount of happiness for u to parade it around town and in the end u had to fake ur happiness and still parade it around town? No? Hmm.. I thought I mean I suppose to feel good about it right? The feeling of victory suppose to be all sweet and juicy but why mine felt so bland? In fact it feels so tasteless to me. Or I just seem to damage my tastebud from the hot peppermint tea that burnt my tongue just now or its just a normal thing that happen when u grew older or it just so happen coz i damaged my brain? Tell me tell me!! *big sigh* I want to feel victorious again!! *crying at the corner* <-- please ignore her I here blame the tuna again. T_______T Anyway need to get back to my oh so boring a.k.a lifeless routine and regain my lower limbs function and head to the shower before cracking my skull for my nutrition tutorial later on. Will getting a very strict lecturer tomorrow hopefully i wont woke up late and get myself lost tomorrow when i'm looking for my tutorial class. Damnit which room should i go again? Wisdom tooth is being an ass again and now it happen on both(!) sides. Been chewing like an old lady and diets are mostly consist of something soft and doesn't require any chewing such as porridge and TUNA! I want to put up some picture but could dig out any good one. T_______T Christmas holiday will start tomorrow! Not like I'm celebrating it or anything but any holiday is well I still not really a holiday coz I still had to do a whole lot off reading anyway. I shall stop before I drive everyone insane. Bye.

And so it has started

So I'm putting off my study mode and on with the exam mode.

Wish me luck!!

Letter to Diary.

Dear diary,

Pardon my long hiatus from you the fact that I am writing you this letter shows that I still haven't forgotten about you. Just that now I am intended to share almost every little dirt of my twisted life to everybody that is reading this entry at this moment. And also that the note book that I used to pour my anger/sadness/happiness/musing had been long unable to accommodate my endless ranting.

So 2 more days before the end of the world *cough* I mean my exam. Normal people would be to hectic/anxious to even bother to on their laptop on this very moment. But I guess I am not normal as I does not follows the norm since I am typing this letter to you and not busy remembering/digesting/reading(why do I keep using slash?) that stakes of notes that been terrorizing my bed for the past few weeks. I just cant read anything right now. My brain seems to be dangerously overload with information and desperately needed a break.

I wish can say I'm well prepared for the exam and that what I've read is enough for a mere pass grade. *sigh* I'm pathetic aren't I? Ok la I might wont be that happy if I just get a pass. Coz all my work must have worth more than what I've did right? Right.

That bazooka that hit me last time left a massive hole on my body so now I am walking around with a massive invisible hole as a remembrance of that incident. All I can say that I'm lucky to be able to live through glancing at it every single moment of my crappy day.

Sometimes I wonder that is that alphabet A and that number 4 really is that significant? Is it worth to fight and fuss about? Should I just wave that white flag and surrender willingly to that imaginary opponent? But saying that alone hurts more than actually fall from that war from that imaginary opponent. In fact, if I were to actually do it the past me who worked/fought/bite(kidding!) hard to get the present me into this position that I am standing right would have haunt me and drive me insane until I eat my own guts and die doing it.

So diary I didn't give up. And I'm glad I didn't coz I seems to be getting on my games and my efforts are actually showing some positive results lately. Nowadays passing that notice board that shows that alphabet typed proudly beside my name/matrix number at least could provide me some temporary comfort and joy.

2 more days and counting.

Strange that I've been so fragile these days. Even I couldn't stand myself. Maybe its the stress.

Du'h I saw a pimple!! *freaks out*

yours truly.

Red Bull Anyone?

Study week!!!

Yes it is not a typo I really do have only one ONE! bloody week for me to cover/revise/re-read 4 FREAKING modules that consist of mountain of lecture notes and require tons of reference books each. T___________T

How annoying it is to find out that even though you had previously studied until you've vomited/cough/shit(?) out blood and in the end you still had difficulty to remember all those notes? why why WHY?????? ARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!~/floor

*slap self*

I mean how hard it is to remember parasympathetic* cause erection and sympathetic* cause ejaculation huh huh?? That's nothing.

But memorizing the mechanism of action, side effects, indication, and not to mention tongue twisting names of more than 15 different types of drug from one ONE! single sympathomimetics* and adrenergic blockers* lecture notes?!! Now that's hell baby!

I'm glad that I didn't choose Pharmacy coz damn I hate Pharmacology!!

Hate it.

Still very very Hate it.

T_________________________________________________________T

But I know no matter how intense my hatred towards Pharmacology I would still had to go through it and it would still be the most worn out and ugliest text book that I've own due to over usage/flipping/highlighting/sleep on/drools on/spills coffee on. *sigh*

Ok ok gtg, had to pump myself with Red Bull* to spare myself from that unnecessary arrhythmia and diuretic effect of coffee and go study till my brain hypertrophied*.

Yes, only for the hard-working people.

T__________________________________T

Bye. *gulp gulp gulp, Ahhh~*

Random: you like vampire? No I am talking about the incredibulously hawt Edward Cullen* *faint*, but his funny great-great(x100 to infinity and beyond~) great uncle Count Dracula. Haha, ok fine they are not related or do they hmmm?? But anyway the movie is super funny ok. So go laugh your Gluteus Maximus* off.

p/s: Asthmatic people are advise to prepare your inhaler as excessive laughter can cause asthma attack. Laugh at your own risk.

Footnote (according the order of *), coz I am nice enough not to let you lost:
1) No, no this sympathetic doesn't mean that u feeling pity on anybody. So u feeling sympathy DOES NOT cause ejaculation (guys u can breath now) and feeling almost(para) pity wont give u erection too.
2)err. You don't wanna know it. Really wanna know? Ok, it can give you headache. No kidding.
3)Red bull still contain caffeine. whoopadeedo me so happy didn't know that 1,3,7-trimethylxanthine IS caffeine. See this is another reason Pharmacology suck! Interested? Read Red bull.
4)Increase in size of tissue or organ due to enlargement of its cells.
5)Seriously? NEXT.
6)Ass. Not you the word.

Busy Bee!!

This is the time where I should be having that brief moment of panic attack and went cuckoo for uhm approximately 1 hour become too tired to notice any rocking sounds my bed made and finally drifted off to that unwanted excessive sleep that cause all this mess in the beginning. Yes, that is confusing but luckily I manage to get hold of myself and left a bit of sanity for me to type this blog entry and bore you with these senseless sentences that my fingers made by punching the alphabets on my keyboard. T_________T Help I'm trapped in this body of mine!! Who the hell type all those things that you just read?

*slap self*

Okay I'm back. Like I say panic attack.

Anyway I've been thinking maybe I should be including something medical mumbo-jumbo like maybe an entry about acne? Or menstruation/period or like why we couldn't eat after 7pm and why coffee could make your breast become smaller (wtf!!), well you get my point. Maybe next time coz I dont know what topic type about yet and I seriously need to finish deciphering this whole bundles of lecture notes.*flipping through pages* Why do everything needs to be short forms? They try to make us feel dumber izit?? T__________T

Omg! My housemate was like so good in studying long hours. She could like study the whole day and would like totally glued to her chair or to her book and would not move unless if it is necessary like going to the loo/eat/entertaining the bored connie asking her why she could stand studying so long and trying to get her to teach me her secret in studying long hours. she was like a motivation for me to study coz whenever you saw her you would feel like you dont study enough (why do I sounds like a bimbo suddenly??). *steal a glance at her while typing this just in case shes coming*

I'm gonna stop now. I am so wu liao T_____T.

Its Official: I am Happily Broke!

Yay!! After a few day contemplating into this serious *ahem* matter I finally made my decision to go for it. Yes I am going to spend invest a shitload amount of ringgit into this:

THE BODY SHOP Make-up Academy Workshop!!

Nobody can describe the guilt I was in after spending those $$$ to join this workshop so that 3 expensive hours and those promised goodie bag better be good!!

*Happy mode on*

I'm gonna have FUN FUN FUN doing what girls love most doll-up with pricey MAKE-UP plus learning to do it the right way straight from the professional.

So what will happen on that awesome day? Well, it would be a 3hours hands-on basic make-up skill. So the thing will starts off by having our skin checked up and then moved on to applying make-up step by step. Sounds so vague I know T________T. But don't fret me will spills all the dirt once I got back from it which would be another week to go. Till then ASS-sessment alert!! Gonna be busy cramming my head with those nonsensical medical mumbo-jumbo and staying up super late while praying that my panda eye won't become much worst than it already now T______________T. So wish me a tons of luck!!

chiao~

UPDATE: I'm R-I-C-H again!!! Money has been deposited for me to spend on new clothes, totes, shoes oh and on tuition fee and more books so I am super elated!

I Thought I'm Through With This

I thought I'm coping it well but reality hit me again today. HARD!

How could it be that hard to just let go of the thing that were painful to you and just go on with life? It shouldn't be that hard to let go. Somebody tell me that the pain will go away with time. At least theirs do. How come mine don't?How come?

I let my self slipped away from the life that I plan on to live. And I loathe myself for letting myself get drifted away by other unnecessary, minor, unimportant things that forced me to take the long way out away from that path that I already meticulously craft and plan in this big head on mine. That mistake cost me my joy, my self-esteem, my confident and evidently my sincere smiles and laughter. I lost my own character together with it. Maybe I would still laugh at your funny lame jokes but I've become much colder than what I used to be.

I hate the fact that I was treated as if I'm different from everyone else. The fact that you people now think I am fragile and words must be filtered so that you won't say the wrong thing that might hurt me. I'm an observer don't think I didn't notice anything I not 5. And doing so actually made it worst. We just happen to be taking a different path now.

If only things took off in a different way. If only...

But after all those things that happened I think I still do dare to say that it makes me stronger. It makes me notice another side of me. The Super Connie in me. Who grew bigger day by day from the daily supplement of moral support, wishes, hopes and aspiration either from me, my family, boyfriend, friends and some random people who smiles at me. Lucky for me she's strong, lucky for me she never judge when everyone else around me including me judges me, lucky for me she's not a coward that runs away and cries at the corner of the rooms, lucky for me she's there. Coz I knew i would've gone all haywire without her.

Time to square up my shoulder and put on that happy face of mine again!

Cool ScribeFire!!

Wee~ *twirl around with hands raised in the air* Okay I might be the last person on earth who just discover this extension on mozilla, don't answer that but I still wanna say that I'm so glad that I saw it and download it coz it is Bloody Uh-May-Zing People!!!!!!!

So now I can like manage my blog while I watch youtube/looks for information(school workT__T/or what ever shit that I do whenever I use mozilla browser!!! In fact I am doing it right now well uhm not studyingT__T but waiting for the youtube video to finish buffering while typing this entry. Multi-tasking is so much fun! Somemore this extension have a direct link to flickr and youtube(not like i'm using any for now but I still find it cool to have it O.o) so it'll be easier to put up your vids or pics. It also have the strikethrough button so now I'm not gonna have that pesky problem that whenever I copy and paste something from Words my words always been chopped off or the font going to be way off. Thus, connie will have a less miserable life from now on.*relieve T3T~*

Happy!!~

note:connie want to eat Onigiri suddenly but dunno how bo T___T. Gonna make tuna salad tomorrow!!

Update: not happy od. Wisdom tooth is not being cooperative again T_______T Boohoo~~ Considering about doing wisdom tooth extraction but too damn scary!!! So I rather just tahan the pain lor. Gosh I am super!

All Sugar No Spice...

The best candy ever.


It is not because it taste good (coz it doesn't really have any taste, or my taste bud got problem O.o), or because it look pretty but because the characters in sailormoon also eat it. WTF?! I know.

I WAS a die hard fan for sailormoon last time and I am not ashamed to admit it. Hahaha.. And I must admit the comic book really gave a lot of influence to me even in my taste for man. Remember Mamoru?(is that how it spell?) sailormoon's boyfriend/husband/one time enemy/prince/king/tuxedo mask?? Now that I come to compare him(yes the comic book character *nodding*) with Boyfriend they do had that bit of similarities. I mean long legs, huge eyes, girly eyelash(sorry boyfriend T___T), and super skinny Poof! Mr. Boyfriend is my Mamoru. OMG I can't stop thinking 'bout it now.

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Owh and sailormoon's body. OMG! *heart!!* I always want to have that type of body but considering my circumstances now one can only dream.T_____T Okie dokie stop with the painful height issue topic. *Chanting:I am tall, I am tall, I am tall~~*

Plus did you notice that after sailormoon, the super duper mini skirt become the It thing? I'm not saying that Spice Girl has been no help making it famous but if you start thinking who come first sailormoon or Spice Girl? Can you see my point now? So MAYBE the one who decide what Spice Girl wear was also a sailormoon fan?? Hmmm....

*****

Class starts tomorrow and I am still on holiday mood. Die.

Happy Monthniversary!!!!!!!!111

Mr. Boyfriend stop by at my house today. At 9am(!!!) in the morning T_____T

Actually he'd been begging me to do a study date since like uhm.. gazillion years ago just that I am so lazy wanna had to dress up and act proper when I am studying with him. But since the whole hostel just left him alone and the cafe are close for raya holiday, I would be cruel if I let him catch mice for lunch and dinner.

Hahahaha... mice for lunch & dinner... Hahahaha *wipe tear* Okay enough with lame joke. *serious mode on*

So armed with lecture notes and 4 packet of porridge (me, him, and fellow housemates) he came. And guess what the porridge taste so good that I actually eat like a slob in front of him. So act proper. Haih.. why am I like this one T________T


But me eating like a pig in front of him is not the main topic today. Today is the second day of the month again so that means that it is our 15th monthniversary day!! Before I had any chance to say the usual Happy Monthniversary wishes to him he quickly asked me to get him some water. When I come back with the water he did the sweetest things ever. He surprises me with a bouquet of purple roses!!!! Well not really a bouquet lah just three roses only just to represent the 3 icky words that I just love to hear he say..Heee~~


ZOMG I'm so like a love sick puppy now. T3T

Love you boyfriend Happy Monthniversary.. Big X & O!!

Gastro+Orgasmic= Gastrorgasmic.. Geddit?

Wake up too early today and the still dreamy me go straight to my wardrobe and plan what to wear to go down for breakfast today. Then I find something really wrong. Why do this hotel room looks so familiar as my room ah?? *rub eyes and blink 10 times*

It is MY room. I'm at KL now. Boo~

I just came back from a 3D3N trip from Penang yesterday. The 6 Hour (!!!) trip back totally worn me out I mean seriously after reach home from Pudu I unpack my mountain of dirty laundry which I know i will break my back washing it, shower (reluctantly shower T___T, 6 hour remember??), then straight away sway into my wonderland as soon as my head reach the pillow-my pillow not some cheap hotel pillow.

But as happy as I am being back to my room, I suddenly come to a realisation that being back to KL means no more good food to fill my stomach. 12 hour post-Penang, I now crave for more Penang food.

So now, I decide to blog about the Penang food to fill in the void in me(cehwah! sounds so damn emo lah pula -___-)

note: This blog contain pictures that can cause excessive drooling. So please prepare towels/tissues/cups/mugs/bowls or whatever to to wipe away or to catch your saliva before moving on. Viewer discretion is advise.

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Lazy arse! thought I told you to get something for your saliva. Well, don't say I didn't warn you.

First day

Eat Lor mee and Duck thigh in herbal soup (sound so healthy but its nice oo!! *defending* well actually forgot what it called but the name I gave explain what it is od right??) for breakfast. Sadly I didn't take any picture of the foods coz after taking 6 hour trip (26sept on 11pm-27sept 5am, explains the 3D3N) from KL to Penang and had to wait at the bus terminal before we take taxi to Georgetown and finally check in our hotel at 7am you'll be too famish to even think about taking picture of the food. T____T feel so regret for not taking it now.

Buah Berangan. I dunno what they called it in English but the smell of it alone can make u so dreamy. Angan-angan= day dreaming. So Berangan= day dreamy lah kan? I love the smell of it. Boyfriend say it is roasted together with coffee beans that's why it smells so damn delicious. Apparently KL oso got sell one but I got no transport to go to any pasar malam here at KL mah so I never eat it before lah. *shy*


Tambun biscuit. I tell you this iddy-biddy tidbits can be so addictive. It is bite size so that you can easily pop one into your mouth and choose either to chew it or just let it melt in your mouth slowly savouring the taste. Mmmm~ *wipe drools* And please take note that I took great effort to resist myself from eating the whole biscuits and just bite the biscuits in halve just to show you how the content look like okay!!

Eat Or Chien= oyster fried with eggs. They said that Penang Or Chien really nice one but this one doesn't taste thattt good to me. Maybe I go buy at the wrong stall? and boyfriend coldly says that it is not tasty and keep saying that Kuching one is better and served in bigger portion. Uhmm... wonder how it would change my view towards this one or not.

Char Koay Teow. You can find the stall that sell this scathering almost everywhere throughout Penang cooked with different style. About the taste rating is about 5/10 for me lah cause I am not a big fan of fried noodles/koay teow but the fresh prawn that they used. Now that's another thing to talk about.

Prawn that they use in most of the ingredient in penang food are so fresh that it can make your mouth water and might gives you gastrorgasmic just by looking at it. No kidding!! The people of penang seems to master the great skill needed to cook the prawn just right. Not too raw and yet not overly done. cause i hate it when my prawn are still slightly raw cow it got this very gross taste of seafood and if it is too overly cooked the prawn will shrunk and lost its sweet juices. In Penang the prawn that they cooked is just too good that no word can even explain it...its tenderness, the flavour, the sweetness of its juice that flows into your mouth and the sounds of it when you chew it is just simply mind blowing.

Ais Kacang. Or we in Sabah we call it ABC for ais batu campur. This is just pure genius! Whoever thought of putting icecream on top of ais kacang deserve to get a noble prize. They really make people happier. Well, minus the fact that it add up the extra calories T____T. But hey, screw that extra calories I'm on holiday so i can eat whatever I want if I say I want icecream on top of my ais kacang you better give it to me! *inhale exhale*

So with that hearty meals I finish my first day at Penang. I was so full I can't move. After everybody finally manage to get on their feet that we finally walk back to the hotel. But then since the trip back are so far away from the hotel, we quickly become hungry again once we reach our rooms.

OMG one day in Penang I already turned into a possessed pig who can't stop eating!

Second Day

Woke up reallyyy early so boyfriend and me decide to walk around Georgetown and take breakfast afterward. Georgetown is so..OLD Historical. Okay, now moving on to what I take for breakfast.

Curry Mee. OMG!!!!11 Gastrorgasmic again!! This is SOOOO nice.Got Prawn *heart*, diced pork blood, taufu, tauge, oyster, sliced squid, mee hoon and noodle mix together in an coconut milk+curry paste decorated with pudine leaves. Mix all the concoction together and it taste FANTABULOUS!!!!!!!1

Indian Rojak which was made by chinese (does it mean that it's chindian??). Suspicious with the taste but the uncle claims that his indian rojak is famous ( among the indian??) so we gave it a try lah. Rating 6/10. It taste almost the same as what i can find at our faculty cafeteria but with a much more better sauce lah of course.

Kon Low Mian. This is my friend's order actually but she ask me to order cause she forgot to ask the lao ban to add noodle in her beef balls (no pun intended) soup. T____T Don't know how it taste like too forgot to ask my friend. But judging by the time she take to gobble it down it must have taste very good. *gulp*

Went to Penang Hill. Which is sadly closed down for maintainance. Boo~

On the way to Kek Lok Si Temple. Stop at a restaurant before going up to the temple and order Asam Laksa. Another Gastrorgasmic delight T3T~~

Finally after we are fully recharge we finally climb up to the temple. On the way we saw this ponds full of turtles. FULL!! The turtle are practically fighting and kicking with each other to get into the sun or away O.o!!!

Went to snake temple afterward. Forced by boyfriend to see the snake exhibiton.

And that is the most Giganormous snake I have ever seen in my entire 19 years of life O.o!!!~ And this one can swallow a full grown goat (big one!!) whole!!! Almost die of acute myocardial infarction and hypoglycemic because standing to close to so many snake at one time. I feel like my leg turned into jelly after finishing the exhibition. boyfriend plan to cure my snake allergy by exposing me to so many snake at one time back fired. I'm officially incureable Waa!!~~~

Went to Gurney Drive. Leg turn no jelly no more after the smells of food. On that time my tummy turn a somersault knowing that it will be well feed again.

Cendol. Hey they got red beans in it lah!!

Rojak Buah. The sauce is homemade and it taste really goooood.

Otak-otak. Its big and to a dissapointment it doesnt taste as good as it look. A total waste T________T.

Char mee or fried noodles. It is tasty. But I still prefer the one we got at Tamparuli, Sabah.

Siput duri. Look something like the siput sedut but dont ever suck this one coz you'll end up poking your nose instead. You pick it using that sate stick and dip it into its sauce and yum yum. It is very sweet.

Lala. It is fried with anchovy and flavoured with curry powder. I'm not a fan of it but everyone else seems to like it very much. *shrug*

Muar Chee. Its uhm.. something sticky like a solid white sticky thingy that is mixed with peanut powder, sugar, and more peanuts. It is sweet and chewy. Out of word T____T. But it does not come from Muar, Johor! Already confirm that with Boyfriend.

Fried Prawns, Fried calamaries, and fried chicken skin!!! It's a lie that anybody don't like fried chicken skin. Remember that whenever you go to KFC or eat fried chicken that you always keep the skin to the side so that you can eat it last coz its the best part of all?

Penang people are so clever that take away the chicken skin, fried it and later sell it to stupid Sabahan people like me who would die to have it. So not only that they gain profit they also become healthier coz they eat skinless chicken mah. Clever right right?? Right.

Day two finish with me being overly fed once again. My tummy start to show some bumps but I sleep with a wide smile on my face that night. Heee~~

Third Day

Went to the market and ordered Kuay Kak for breakfast. It is a bit too spicy for my liking. Rating 6/10. Apparently the lao ban gave us the wrong plate from another customer that ask for their to be extra zing T____T.

Bak Kua or Rou Gan. Never seen this one at Sabah before. My Penang friend claims it only can be found at Penang. Life is so unfair Cause this taste better than any Bak Kua I've ever taste before. Another Gastrorgasmic momentos. *big teary eyes* And this is by far the best food I've ever take for the whole 19 (almost 20) years of my life!! *fireworks background*

Went to Chocolate Boutique afterwards and taste like 20++ different types of chocolate. Didn't take any pictures cause to intoxicated by the chocolate.

It is raining on the last day so can't really go anywhere in the morning. Before checking out from the hotel me and Boyfriend go and take a quick bite. boyfriend mumble the name to quickly and pretended not to listen to my question afterward and just continue shoving food into that tiny frame of his. T____T

Later that evening after check out we straight away take Rapid Penang and headed to the bus terminal.

After the gastrorgasmic experience I had in Penang I can't wait to go again. Hee~

I'm so Blurr~

Feel so guilty for not been updating recently. U see i dont have an interesting life to blog about.

Anyway i am here now typing this blog to kill time and hoping i could find something to do other than stuffing myself with comfort food to go through my sucky life. *sigh*

I LOVE holidays. why?

Needless to ask? but anyho i still will continue to rant about it in a few words about it (Lie). i like holidays bcoz for the obvious:

1. can wake up reeeaalllyyy late and nobody to scold u for it. (well usual day got class mah if late will kena tiao by the lecturer in front of 200++ people mah)
2. no PBL!! woohoo~ (for all those who dunno wat is a PBL is its actually a session where u r given a trigger about an imagination patient where you had to guess what illness he/she had and then u had to generate a looooong list of learning issue(things that u think its important and u need to lear about it) and study all about the things dat involve the sickness. I lost u didnt i? haih.. nevermindT____T)
3. eat for free!! homecook meals somemore= heaven.. i heart momma cooking nyummmm~ dat explains the recent weight gain T______T*
4. speedy internet connection!! i end up not willing to close my laptop for the whole week of my holiday just bcoz wanna download so many things!! lucky it doesnt explode..
5. become more fairer. not that i'm not fair enough but seriously go to stay at my town for a week then u see the result urself. cheapest whitening treament ever!!(well if you minus all the travel and living expenses for u to come to my town lah)
6. ermm..gona leave it empty to fill in later.
7. I think i'm done.

but sadly its holiday no more for today.. boohoo~ class starting today and its 8-5 one somemore!!!!? the admin are merciless humph!

sadly today things didnt reli goes well for me. I'd change change my contact lenses with a new one today and stupid me wear it straight from the box and didnt even got tym to soak it for a while or spin it in my contact lense cleaner for a while coz i'm kinda kelam-kabut dis morning. It was the worst mistake i ever done!!

after i was like reach my lecture hall and prepare for the 1st lecture od my contact lense start to buat hal. it moves each time i blink my eyes and i need to kinda like place it back where it belongs. Not only that it make my eyes super itchy okay!! i ended up keep rubbing my eyes all day and now i look like a bee sting my eyes or something. Plus the eye shit keep coming out and i had to like remove it each 5 minute or so. thats why lah padan muka who told me not to spend just that 3 minute to spin it on that cleanser 1st now got swollen eye who the one that malu?? who who??!!

So,tomorrow gonna wear glasses od. Hopes the swell resides by then. T______T

Hello, its me again!

Its been quite a while since my last entry. I've been busy soul searching... funny how that sounds to me. I realize that I suck in keeping track with my life. Haiz... 

I been really distracted lately. Dunno why but I can't concentrate on my study. I wish I know what makes me so distracted *sob sob* maybe after knowing it i could fix it and go on with life. I better be quick the next test is coming up real soon!! *bite nails* 

for no apparent reason i was becoming more and more lazy suddenly... I sleep more, taking meals irregularly, have abnormal appetite, and having a crazy mood swings. I always find myself stuck in my own world and I was unable to lower down my guard and just let anyone come in and just talk about it. I always had my best poker face on (and now I think I'm an expert on it!!) and manage to LIE to everybody that EVERYTHING is OK. But let me tell this, NOTHING is OK! EVERYTHING IS FUCKING WRONG!! and I AM NOT OK!! There i said it. 

Come to think about it all the symptoms listed above clearly shows a sign of depression. Haiz.. I thought I've dealt with that?Guess there's no permanent fix for it *shrug* screw all those thing they say about just feel good and you'll be fine. Sorry it had to be better than that coz i don't buy it. 

Just feel so pity for the boyfriend.. He had to put up with all my absurd mood swings. Bless him. Hope it is not that tormenting. 

Met his parent family few days ago. And they are bunch of super amazing people. I'm so happy about that. We went out for the whole day together and don't feel awkward at all. Cool right? Right. Now I cant really imagine going through life without the boyfriend. Did I mention it already? I LOVE him!! No matter what I been through I feel like everything is gonna be fine as long as he is with me.

ASS-essment Alert!!

The first Ass-essment is tomorrow and I don't feel like I'm ready for it just yet. Hey, who am I kidding? When did I ever be prepared for ASS-essment before... Hmm~~

Seriously studied hard enough for it though( I guess *shrug* )...

Damn it still so many notes to go!! Burning midnight oil again.. aww~~



note to self: keep up the good work by reading before each lecture. Very VERY useful!!

* high caffeine + sugar- rest=@%*#@*

A beautiful lyric..

Leave Out All The Rest
by Linkin Park


I dreamed I was missing,
You were so scared.
But no one would listen
'Cause no one else cared.


After my dreaming,
I woke with this fear.
What am I leaving,
When I am done here?


So if you're asking me I want you to know;
When my time comes,
Forget the wrong that I've done.
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.


And don't resent me,
And when you're feeling empty,
Keep me in your memory.
Leave out all the rest.
Leave out all the rest...


Don't be afraid,
I've taken my beatings;
I've shared what I made.


I'm strong on the surface,
Not all the way through.
I've never been perfect,
But neither have you.


So if you're asking me I want you to know;
When my time comes,
Forget the wrong that I've done.
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.


Don't resent me,
And when you're feeling empty,
Keep me in your memory.
Leave out all the rest.
Leave out all the rest...


Forgetting;
All the hurt inside you've learned to hide so well.
Pretending;
Someone else can come and save me from myself.


I can't be who you are...
When my time comes,
Forget the wrong that I've done.
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.


Don't resent me,
And when you're feeling empty,
Keep me in your memory.
Leave out all the rest.
Leave out all the rest...


Forgetting;
All the hurt inside you've learned to hide so well.
Pretending;
Someone else can come and save me from myself.


I can't be who you are,
I can't be who you are.

*****

still on ASSessment mania and can't wait for Friday to come... *big grin*

Wise n Busy

Its been a while that the growth of my wisdom tooth had been bothering me but yesterday was the worst ever!!! The pain was unbearable!!!!
And yet I am unable to squeeze in a dental appointment!! This is so frustrating!!!

My assessment is coming up this Friday. So I am busy busy busy busy~~

But I am still looking forward to it coz me and my girlfriends are going CLUBBING!! It would be my first to go to one like ever!!yay~~
Hopefully it turns out just as i imagine it would be... Which is F-U-N! It is my first time so I want it to go super fun and memorable...

Just one problem though what am I going to wear??!! I seriously have no whatsoever idea on what to wear. All I know is I don't want to look like a ho or boring or like somebody's grandma trying to be Paris Hilton. Geez... can't believe I said that but hey u gotta admit that she's good and you hate it.

Ok that's probably not her best look coz I am too damn lazy wanna google for it.
But I guess u would like her a bit if she's look like this once a while..


Thanks Paris now I know what NOT to wear...

Rise and Shine

This morning i woke up into this...

the sky from my window

the view from my window

Try as i might but i cant seem to remember what my dream is about. I guess its just one of those dream that you forgot right after u woke up.. shoot! maybe I'd dreamt a lucky number and didn't even remember it?!! * hyperventilating*

Anyway, i never realize that my view from my window would be this tranquilizing. The reason being that i am not a morning person or that i just dont open up my curtain after i woke up each day before going to class coz i just to damn rush to care about the damn curtain and the damn view.
But today is saturday, no class= no rushing needed. why i wake up early on saturday u ask? I know its weekends and i had plenty of reasons to sleep as late as possible and maybe just sleep for the whole day and just wake up to pee and eat something then go back to my slumber all over again. But i cant. Being a freaking medstud (medical student) that i am had cost me my sleeping hour and demanded me to study my ass off every single freaking day until i:

1. become crazy ( believe me i'm at verge of it)
2. had a sudden death due to boredness
3. had caffein overdose
4. can produce laser beam from my panda eyes
5. decide to pack all of my medical books and sell them off and finish the money at one shopping trip. Not enough money to satisfy your shopping addiction u say? crazy ah? u know how much one book can cost? RM100++ You know!! and i had over 10 of them! u do the math.
6. die of shock looking my reflection on the mirror. With coffee stained teeth, panda eyes, eye bags and unorganized hairdo. Gross!

But then i still forced to risk myself and just guai guai de go study. heish..

By the way what if the number really did come out today?!! I would win me a shitload amount of $ if i buy it! Then screw my coin collection, i could use it to pay my bloody expensive tuition fee, go shopping, travel and probably bribe the university to let me skip my education and give my bloody degree already.. ok i went to far on that last one... but think what u can do with all that money?
Maybe i could donates it somewhere like Africa and change the life of many.. Hmmm....
*
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*
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Nahh... i should just stick to the original plan.. original plan goooood~
*evil-selfish grin*
oh my gosh i should start remembering really hard now!!

*oh! oh! i remember an 8 lucky number, rich number, goood number~*